At times I feel like an insecure child wishing for understanding. It's not that easy I know; but I would like it. I do in fact wish for understanding from those I actually find myself opening up to.
Perhaps I share too much, and yes, I suppose I am complaining. I have never been so naïve as to assume I truly comprehend everything, and I'm fully aware that I have many shortcomings. I don't ever regret time spent learning from others and especially teaching others. Building understanding does take time and effort but I often wish I could just skip all of the games and just find those with experience similar to my own.
Anyway…
I moved into my new place on Wednesday and admittedly was very disappointed. Carpets were dirty, walls were dirty, holes were partially patched, and the place smelled like… something bad. But the management really stepped up; the carpets were cleaned, leaky plumbing fixed, stove fixed, and all the other things that make student housing a temporary home were taken care of. The place smells great, the stove works; it feels like a home instead of a hotel. It's really starting to grow on me.
For the first time in a long time I spent the entire weekend very busy while doing absolutely nothing productive! It all started Friday with IMAX Spiderman III, moved to Johnny Carino's and then went from there to Ogden Canyon and a timeshare with old friends and great times. It was nostalgic, the Halo, the basketball games (though I've never been a huge fan of basketball,) Dumb and Dumber, Smallville and more Smallville and of course more Halo. I have Remy Zero forever stuck in my head!
And now for my final thought (yes, now is where you lean forward with anticipation!)
I simply spread myself too thin. I can see myself trying to be everywhere for everyone, but only seem to show others I won't be there when I say I will. I try to justify it, but come on Jarom… you should know better by now… just say it… just say no…
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